91: Mary Flo Ridley | Let's Talk Birds and Bees

91: Mary Flo Ridley | Talking to your kids about sex

Mary Flo Ridley | Let's Talk Birds and Bees

The Birds & Bees Founder, Mary Flo Ridley, has been passionately sharing this message all over the world for 30 years.

Mary Flo and her husband Dave have been married for 40 years, they have three married children, and eight grandchildren.

After growing up in El Paso, Mary Flo graduated from SMU. When she isn’t working on B&B she loves playing with her grandchildren, baking, and traveling!

Mary Flo Ridley joins me to talk about simple, foundational conversations to have with our children, ranging from toddlers to teens, that will shape their sexual health for years to come.

Questions Mary Flo and I Discussed:

  1. (4:25) Even in 2020, I have conversations with friends who cringe when it comes to having the “birds and bees” talk with their children.  We deal with questions like when is it the right time, what should I say, and so on, but Birds and Bees is all about getting rid of this idea that this is a one-time conversation in parenting. What are you hoping to see in exchange?
  2. (9:12) Let’s begin by talking to the parents who have toddlers, what is a conversation pattern they can establish to show their children they are the loving authority on the topic of their bodies?
  3. (13:36) What are some key conversations and general language parents can practice with their elementary age children?
  4. (19:11) The average age someone first sees pornography is 11 yo and are as likely to see it accidentally as on purpose.  How do you encourage parents to deal with discussing pornography with their children?
  5. (27:20) For parents of middle and high school age children (or really all young parents), talking about masturbation and puberty feels daunting. How do you encourage parents to address this topic?
  6. (32:30) Birds & Bees offers a curriculum. What can one expect if they use your curriculum?
  7. (36:15) Do you have any encouragement for the parent who feels like they are “behind” or have failed to create an open dialogue surrounding sex and our bodies?
  8. (39:38) Lastly, what are some books and other resources you would recommend to parents on this topic?

Quotes to Remember:

“What is the main thing you want your children to know about sex? If they’re growing up in your family? If you could give that answer in one sentence? What would that sentence be?”

“When they [children] leave, what will they take with them that I have taught them on this topic, both in words and deeds?”

“We also have to define what does it mean when we say private? [It] means no one else touches those or asks to see those or, these days, you also have to include, no one takes a picture of those.”

“Use your pediatricians voice. Pretend that you’re talking to them as their pediatrician. What do you think that would sound like, instead of getting all weirded out?”

“I want parents to realize your child is not going to school with just six year olds, they’re going to school with the oldest sibling of any six year old in that room.”

“You have to know that if you want to be the one to tell them, with your values, it’s going to be so much sooner than you think, You don’t think your young child is ready to hear this, but you’re leaving them wide open, when you don’t say anything, to anything they may hear in the culture.”

“I know that some parents will think, oh, that’s far too young to explain things to a child, but it’s also too young for them to hear it from someone else.”

“One suggestion we have for parents is just to own it. Go ahead and say there is a topic I have avoided a little bit, because it’s a little uncomfortable, but that’s not going to be the case anymore. This topic is the topic of sex.”

 

Resources Mentioned:

Related Episodes:

Episode Sponsor:

Heather M. Dixon | Author, Speaker, Bible Teacher

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91: Mary Flo Ridley | Let's Talk Birds and Bees Quote
91: Mary Flo Ridley | Let's Talk Birds and Bees Quote
91: Mary Flo Ridley | Let's Talk Birds and Bees Quote
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